Ex-DOGE worker Coristine attacked, Trump threatens federal DC takeover

| Importance: 9/10 | Status: confirmed

Edward “Big Balls” Coristine, 19, was assaulted during attempted carjacking by 10 teenagers in Logan Circle at 3 AM. Trump immediately used the incident to threaten federal takeover of DC, stating “If D.C. doesn’t get its act together, we will have no choice but to take Federal control.” This occurred despite violent crime being down 26% and at 30-year lows. The incident became pretext for deploying 1,450+ National Guard troops to DC, placing local police under federal control.

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